One of the most life-changing lessons I’ve ever learned was how we as human beings WASTE TIME AND ENERGY on behaviors that don’t serve us.
If we want to reclaim our power in life, we should delete the following seven wasteful behaviors from our lives (and businesses!):
Proving, pleasing, defending, controlling, convincing, blaming, and denying our own greatness.
(Thanks, Darla LeDoux, for teaching me about these behaviors in your “Power in the Hallways” training years ago.)
In a nutshell…
1. Proving is about trying to show someone you either are, or aren’t, some quality.
2. Pleasing is about trying to gain the approval of some person or group of persons, because without this approval you don’t feel worthy, or you feel deficient.
3. Defending is about protecting something you feel is being threatened. If you believe in a universe filled with threats, then defending will be one of your key life activities no matter what the situation.
4. Controlling is about trying to manage how other people perceive you, which prevents you from being 100% present in the moment.
5. Convincing is about expending effort trying to persuade someone who didn’t ask to be persuaded or who truly doesn’t want to be persuaded.
6. Blaming is about placing your results (i.e., your experience in life/business/relationships) in someone else’s hands, whether they’ve asked for this power or not.
7. Denying your own greatness is about hiding and minimizing who you are and what you have to offer — when, instead, you should be magnifying your ability to be seen and heard by the right people.
Which one of these insidious behaviors has crept into your life and/or business?
Usually there’s at least one lurking.
Sometimes we’re not even aware that we’re engaged in these behaviors. And yet they silently inform many of our decisions and actions.
I struggled with ALL of these wasteful behaviors in the past (and admittedly still struggle with some today). For years, I didn’t take full responsibility for all aspects my life.
The good news is, the MOMENT we realize we’re engaged in these behaviors, we can immediately make the decision simply to drop them. And never look back.
Some people get depressed over how many years were “wasted.” But this depression is largely unnecessary.
The so-called wasted years simply serve as a reference point to remind us what behaviors don’t work for us.
The sooner we understand which behaviors don’t work for us, the better.
After all, wasteful behaviors do nothing more than limit our potential in life. They put a cap on our joy, our creative action, our productivity, our success, and our personal freedom.
However, don’t be confused by my use of the word “they.”
They — i.e., the wasteful behaviors we’re engaging in — are ultimately OUR behaviors. Which means we can change them if we want.
Are any of the 7 wasteful behaviors present in your organic business?
Are they present in your marketing?
What kind of insight do you need to be able to identify and change these behaviors?
Talk soon,
Michelle
P.S. Next week I’ll give examples of how each of the 7 wasteful behaviors can show up in an organic business.
Michelle Lopez is a writer, editor, and copywriter with a BA in English/Creative Writing from the University of Colorado at Boulder.